*MUST LOVE DOGS*

The title of this post sounds like it would be for a dating profile, huh?  Well, it’s not.

I actually posted something a little while ago about where I currently am in my life and how I feel about it.  I didn’t go into too much detail, but it has been on my mind a lot lately.  Some days I am fine because I realize I have my own journey to experience, but every once in a while I have a little slip-up and it gets me down and throws off my day.  Writing is therapeutic and maybe someone else out there is having the same thoughts as me, so my hope is that this post can help them as well.  Below are some "tips" that I have picked up along the way...

I am not a big alcohol drinker for several reasons and I am constantly judged because of that.  If I do have an alcoholic beverage it is maybe 1 or 2 and then I am good to go.  I have always said, I don't need alcohol to have a good time yet, the judging still continues.  Since when did it become the coolest thing ever to get drunk every single weekend when you're well past the age of 23, do stupid things, and act like an idiot?  Again, I have my personal reasons as to why I just don't need it on that level.  I know some people use it as a calming mechanism, but to me, I have other stress relievers.  Maybe it's because I have had way too many bad memories with people involving alcohol.  That could be part of it.    

Tip 1: Embrace your journey and stay positive.  Just because everyone else is doing it one way doesn’t mean that is what is meant for you.

Tip 1.5:  Don't judge someone when you don't know their story and don't pretend to be someone you're not.

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I am 30.  Well, actually closer to 31 now.  Eek.  Not married.  No kids.  Lost in a world of uncertainty.  Did I make the right decision today?  Yesterday?  Last month?  4 years ago?  Always questioning what I do.  It can be exhausting at times, but also eye opening.  I have made some pretty MAJOR decisions over the past 7 years or so that have changed my life either for the better or presented me with some speed bumps, detours, and road blocks.  Either way, they molded me into who I am today and who I strive to be.  Who cares if my life hasn't turned out how I imagined it would thus far.  That only means it will turn out better than I had originally imagined.  (at least that's what I tell myself)

Tip 2:  Make a decision and stick with it.  Questioning for months and months after it happened and you have already moved on won’t get you anywhere.

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I thought I was going to be married by now with a few kids, because well…I thought I was ready.  BUT now thinking back on it….was I REALLY ready?  Perhaps I was first supposed to:  find myself, go through hell and back emotionally, be in abusive relationships, work dead end jobs, question a career change, eventually find a better job, go through more dead end relationships, move a few times, meet some pretty awful people who I realize I don’t want in my life or don’t want in my future childrens’ lives, find out who my true friends are, lose some other friends, find my passion, start to love myself again, help others reach their goals, and get in the best shape of my life all before marriage and a family…?  I will take that as a yes.    

Tip 3 & 4:  You have to love yourself before you can truly love anyone else.  Surround yourself with people who are going to lift you higher, not bring you down.

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I am a worrier and I care way too much about things.  I don’t necessarily see it as a 100% bad thing.  Do I sometimes wish I would simmer down a little bit in the worrying department?  Yes.  BUT it is in my nature to  care excessively which is why I feel that I was put on this Earth to do 1.  Be Milly’s mom 2.  Become a mom in general, BUT only when I am truly ready 3. Help people.  I tend to put others first and I put Milly in front of everyone.  Let’s face it – she saved my life and it helps she’s so damn cute and loveable too!  During some dark times she was there showing me I had a purpose at that time – to take care of her and WOW has she given me a run for my money!!  I am glad I was home and answered the door that day when her precious little face was staring back at me.

Tip 5:  Get a dog.

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I deserve to take care of myself and focus on me for once, everyone does.  Now this doesn’t mean completely neglect the people in my life, because I just don’t have it in me, although some people along the way did not deserve the treatment I gave them because they were awful, but it just means finding the balance and realizing you need to take care of yourself too.  I have let others beat me to the ground, mistreat me, and disrespect me in the past way too much.  What kind of role model would that have been for a child if I had one when I thought I was ready?  Not a good one.  We need to take care of ourselves first and foremost so that we can take care of others to the best of our ability.  For me, taking care of myself means working out, eating well, and having positive and loving people in my life.

When all of that comes together then I am happy and healthy and I am a better version of myself and everyone wins. 

Tip 6: Take care of yourself so you can take care of others.  When you are the best version of you, others benefit too.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Exercise and living a healthy lifestyle truly has changed my life for the better and has been my saving grace, besides Milly.  I was not always this way when it comes to fitness and clean eating though.  It took some MAJOR falling on my face, regrets, and life lessons to change my attitude and tone.  As a result though, it has become a part of me, who I am,  and what I need!  It is a form of therapy for me; an outlet.  It is a stress reliever.  I also have met some pretty awesome people along the way, which is a bonus  I get to help others reach their health and fitness goals.  I am in good shape and gaining confidence again every day.

Tip 7:  If you want to make a change, ANY change, stop sitting on the sidelines.  Find what makes you happy and don't look back.