*ASKING FOR HELP IS NOT A SIGN OF WEAKNESS*

I decided to get vulnerable with you peeps for a minute because through all the ups and downs, I have been reminded of just how far I have come...get ready, it's long, but interesting.

I admit.  I never EVER liked asking for help.  Still not an easy thing for me to do.  I always thought I could do it ALL myself, every time, even if it kills me.  Example:  I WILL carry 20 bags of groceries inside in 1 trip even if it cuts off my circulation in my arms.  I always thought, it will just be easier if I complete this task the way I want and at my speed.  I’ll figure it out on my own.  I don’t want to inconvenience anyone. 

Requesting support can often make us feel vulnerable and weak.  We usually think that we should be able to do everything ourselves and when we admit that we need help, we think that we are weak.  When we put ourselves and our weakness on the table, most people don’t like to hear “no,” so the fear of rejection takes over.

The crazy part?  My passion is HELPING people.  Weird, right?  I probably should have been a teacher, but that ship has sailed.  The irony of it all is that most of us love to help others, but struggle when it comes to asking for help ourselves.

FLASHBACK TO 2012.  It had already been a few years like this, but I was still trying to mentally recover from an abusive relationship and all of the bad decisions I had made leading up to that point in my life.  I was in a crazy amount of debt, I had a broken soul, negative attitude and outlook, I had a fear of failing, no confidence, trust issues, stuck in a dead end job, adding onto my student loan debt with pursuing my MBA, always waiting for the next shoe to drop, no clue what I wanted to do with my career, hated myself, had hatred in my heart for others, and was just going through the motions of life.  

I was unhappy and had lost myself.  I thought everyone was out to get me and hurt me like I had experienced in the past and as a result, my relationship with my boyfriend at the time eventually shattered.  

I was running (literally) my body into the ground and suffering from shin splints and Plantar Fasciitis flare-ups.  I had an UNHEALTHY relationship with fitness, food, and well, life.  I wasn’t happy with my body and I had a one-track mind when it came to fitness and food.  Exercise a lot and eat a little.  WRONG!  I am ashamed to admit, but I questioned life.  I questioned everything.  Talk about exhausting and pointless.

I would always make excuses and say that I had every reason to be the way I was and feel this way and that no one had any idea what I went through.  No one knew my story.  Which is indeed true, BUT that's not the way to live and get better.

*Side note:  I had Milly during this time too and she actually gave me a purpose and I am not kidding when I say, she saved me.  She was given to me for a reason.*

Anyways...

I NEEDED to ask for help.  I HAD to ask for help.  Something needed to change.  I had so much bottled up inside.  Why would I ask for help though?  I can't admit that.  That would mean I am weak.  Whoa whoa whoa, this girl is NOT weak.

THEN, that same year, I inherited burned copies of the INSANITY workouts.  Yes, burned, bootleg copies.  (Gasp!)  Life changed.  A new challenge was upon me and, as an athlete, I LOVE challenges!  A whole new world had been opened up right before my eyes. 

I struggled with the workouts, but I became addicted.  I fell in love.  I felt like I was gradually coming out of my hole of run, run, run and only eat this and only eat that to something more meaningful.  (Now I am an INSANITY instructor!)  I was feeling better, I was seeing and experiencing changes to my mind, body, and soul. 

I kept up with my first round/attempt of INSANITY and as I was entering into month 2, someone I went to High School with reached out to me about the Beachbody opportunity and specifically, Accountability/Challenge Groups and Shakeology.  She knew I was an athlete, ran races, went to the gym religiously, and just embarked on this INSANITY journey with plenty of struggles.  I was an open book on Facebook (go figure).  Bottom line though was that she knew I needed positivity in my life.

Did I respond?  Yep, sure did.  I said NO and then NO again.  I am “fine” with what I am doing now and just staying in my own little bubble.  I don't believe in shakes, I don't have the money, etc. etc. etc.  (Hello, Introvert!)

Lie.  I was NOT OK on my own, but I wasn't about to admit that I still needed help and wanted to keep this feeling going and wanted more results!   

Sure, I was feeling better, my body was changing, my mood was changing, I loved the feeling after I completed a workout with Shaun T, but I was scared.  I wanted to just keep to myself, but regardless of how much better I was starting to feel, I STILL needed help.  I need guidance, support, motivation, accountability, food tips, and just good ol' fashion help.  I had questions that I wanted answered and I knew what I had to do...

I needed to put myself first for once.  I was worth it and I needed to start making those changes and taking those leaps that were going to get me where I desired to be.  Was this Beachbody adventure going to solve all of my problems?  No, not right away.

She NEVER GAVE UP on me and kept pursuing me and then I finally said the magical word, yes.

I got my Shakeology and ordered Les Mills PUMP and let’s just say $h!t got real.  (I never lifted weights even as a college athlete.)  I met new people who were positive and surprisingly shared similar stories to mine.  It was SO refreshing.  Things kept changing for the better and my life took a drastic turn and all I wanted to do was start sharing my story with everyone.  

I wanted to LEARN more.  I wanted to DO more.  I developed the need and desire to help people who, like me, needed the help, but didn’t want to ask and didn’t know where to start.  Sure enough, I did learn, I did DO, and it's still happening to this day!

I took that leap of faith and joined her AMAZING team as a Coach.  People in my life thought I was crazy because I was still taking MBA classes, working full-time, and trying to find my way, but one thing I knew for sure was that I was in CONTROL.  

“You’re fine, Dana.  You don’t need to lose weight.”  Newsflash!!  It WASN'T all about the weight loss.  It was about the life GAIN.  The attitude change.  The mood change.  The mental and emotion GAINS!  

I didn’t really truly realize that I had that control until my point of view and attitude shifted.  It was quite the change from when I used to just go through the motions, dread everything, and always look at the negative.  I was slowly bringing down my wall and allowing other people into my life…people who were positive, believed in me, and needed help just like I did.  I needed them and they needed me.

I had an unhealthy mindset for way too long.

FLASH FORWARD TO 2015…Am I done with my journey?  Hell no.  I will always be on this journey, but I am in a MUCH better place.  All of the pieces of my puzzle aren’t intact yet, but who cares.  I am working on ME.  Remaining positive isn’t always easy but I made a vow with myself to try as hard as I could to maintain that positive attitude and spirit.  I am HUMAN though, I have slip-ups.  No one is perfect.

I feel stronger and wiser now mentally, emotionally, and especially physically and none of that would have happened if I didn't have people who believed in me and if I didn't start to believe in myself.

*I have learned many things and continue to every day, but one MAJOR one:  DO NOT judge someone until you know their story.  You have NO idea what other people are going through.  You DON’T know their story.*

CONFESSION:  When I first started to notice these drastic changes, I would dwell on the fact that so much time had passed when I was in that dark hole.  What if I would have made these changes earlier?  WHAT IF!?  

You know what that is?  Self-destruction at its finest.  Big no-no.  It’s hard, trust me I know, but you CAN'T dwell on the past. 

After almost 3 years of doing the amazing/challenging/ever-changing workouts, drinking Shakeology, and surrounding myself with the MOST POSITIVE PEOPLE on the planet, I am in a better place and I love that I can help others with their unique journey as well, but I still have a long way to go!

There are lots of negative Nellies out there regarding this Beachbody biz, but everyone is different.

Is it for everyone?  No.  It just happened to, along with Milly, SAVE my life and CHANGE my life so why would I not talk about it and want to share the wealth & knowledge with others?!

IN CLOSING:  Asking for help DOES NOT make you weak, rather it is a sign of STRENGTH.  You may not know it now, but asking for help has the ability to change your life on more than 1 level.  There is nothing to be ashamed of and I am the living proof.  You just need to take that first dreaded, but worthwhile, step.

Believe in yourself and you can achieve anything.

A friend of mine told me once, "You can be bitter or you can be better.  You can't be both.  Your choice."